Don’t Miss
不要错过
Feel free to stop reading this if your career is going great, you’re thrilled with your life, and you’re happy with your relationships. Enjoy the rest of your day, friend, this article is not for you. You’re doing a great job, we’re all proud of you. So you don’t feel like you wasted your click, here’s a picture of Lenny Kravitz wearing a gigantic scarf.
如果你的事业顺风顺水，你对生活感到兴奋，并且你对自己的关系感到满意，请随时停止阅读这篇文章。享受你接下来的日子，朋友，这篇文章不适合你。你做得很好，我们都为你感到骄傲。为了不让你觉得浪费了点击，这里有一张 Lenny Kravitz 戴着巨大围巾的照片。
For the rest of you, I want you to try something: Name five impressive things about yourself. Write them down or just shout them out loud to the room. But here’s the catch — you’re not allowed to list anything you are (i.e., I’m a nice guy, I’m honest), but instead can only list things that you do (i.e., I just won a national chess tournament, I make the best chili in Massachusetts). If you found that difficult, well, this is for you, and you are going to fucking hate hearing it. My only defense is that this is what I wish somebody had said to me around 1995 or so.
对于剩下的你们，我想让你们尝试一下：列出五件关于你自己的令人印象深刻的事情。把它们写下来或者大声喊出来。但是有一个条件——你不能列出任何你是的东西（例如，我是一个好人，我很诚实），而只能列出你做的事情（例如，我刚刚赢得了全国象棋比赛，我做的辣椒是马萨诸塞州最好的）。如果你觉得这很难，那么这篇文章就是为你准备的，你会非常讨厌听到这些。我唯一的辩护是，这是我希望有人在1995年左右对我说的话。
Note: I originally posted this in December of 2012, and to date it has drawn more than 25 million page views. So, uh, it struck a nerve. I regularly update it as times change.
注：我最初在2012年12月发布了这篇文章，到目前为止，它已经吸引了超过2500万次页面浏览。所以，它触动了人们的神经。我会随着时间的变化定期更新它。
6 The World Only Cares About What It Can Get from You
Getty
Let’s say that the person you love the most has just been shot. He or she is lying in the street, bleeding and screaming. A guy rushes up and says, “Step aside.” He looks over your loved one’s bullet wound and pulls out a pocket knife — he’s going to operate right there in the street.
假设你最爱的人刚刚被枪击中。他或她躺在街上，流血尖叫。一个人冲上来说：“让开。”他查看了你爱人的枪伤，然后掏出一把小刀——他打算就在街上进行手术。
You ask, “Are you a doctor?”
你问：“你是医生吗？”
The guy says, “No.”
那人说：“不是。”
You say, “But you know what you’re doing, right? You’re an old Army medic, or …”
你说：“但你知道你在做什么，对吧？你是个老军医，还是……”
At this point the guy becomes annoyed. He tells you that he is a nice guy, he is honest, he is always on time. He tells you that he is a great son to his mother and has a rich life full of fulfilling hobbies, and he boasts that he never uses foul language.
这时那人变得恼火了。他告诉你他是个好人，他很诚实，他总是准时。他告诉你他是个好儿子，生活丰富多彩，充满了令人满足的爱好，并且他从不说脏话。
Confused, you say, “How does any of that fucking matter when my is lying here bleeding! I need somebody who knows how to operate on bullet wounds! Can you do that or not?!?”
你困惑地说：“当我的爱人躺在这里流血时，这些他妈的有什么关系！我需要一个知道如何处理枪伤的人！你能做到吗？！”
Now the man becomes agitated — why are you being shallow and selfish? Do you not care about any of his other good qualities? Didn’t you just hear him say that he always remembers his girlfriend’s birthday? In light of all of the good things he does, does it really matter if he knows how to perform surgery?
现在那人变得激动了——你为什么这么肤浅和自私？你不关心他的其他优点吗？你没听到他说他总是记得他女朋友的生日吗？考虑到他做的所有好事，他是否会做手术真的重要吗？
In that panicked moment, you will take your bloody hands and shake him by the shoulders, screaming, “Yes, I’m saying that none of that other shit matters, because in this specific situation, I just need somebody who can stop the bleeding, you crazy fucking asshole.”
在那慌乱的时刻，你会用沾满血的手抓住他的肩膀，尖叫道：“是的，我说的是其他那些狗屁都不重要，因为在这种特定情况下，我只需要一个能止血的人，你这个疯狂的混蛋。”
So here is my terrible truth about the adult world: You are in that very situation every single day. Only you are the confused guy with the pocket knife. All of society is the bleeding gunshot victim.
所以这是我关于成人世界的可怕真相：你每天都处在那种情况中。只是你是那个拿着小刀的困惑的人。整个社会是那个流血的枪击受害者。
If you want to know why society seems to shun you, or why you seem to get no respect, it’s because society is full of people who need things. They need houses built, they need food to eat, they need entertainment, they need fulfilling sexual relationships. You arrived at the scene of that emergency, holding your pocket knife, by virtue of your birth — the moment you came into the world, you became part of a system designed purely to see to people’s needs.
如果你想知道为什么社会似乎排斥你，或者为什么你似乎得不到尊重，那是因为社会充满了需要东西的人。他们需要建房子，他们需要吃的食物，他们需要娱乐，他们需要满足的性关系。你拿着小刀出现在紧急情况现场，是因为你的出生——你来到这个世界的那一刻，你就成为了一个纯粹为了满足人们需求而设计的系统的一部分。
Either you will go about the task of seeing to those needs by learning a unique set of skills, or the world will reject you, no matter how inoffensive and courteous you are. You will be poor, you will be alone, you will be left out in the cold. Does that seem mean, or crass, or materialistic? What about love and kindness — don’t those things matter? Of course. As long as they result in you doing things for people that they can’t get elsewhere. For you see …
要么你通过学习一套独特的技能来满足这些需求，否则世界将拒绝你，无论你多么无害和礼貌。你会贫穷，你会孤独，你会被冷落。这看起来是不是很刻薄，粗俗，或物质主义？那爱和善良呢——这些东西不重要吗？当然重要。只要它们能让你为人们做一些他们在别处得不到的事情。因为你看……
Related: 7 Reasons The World Is Full Of Hate Groups And Cults（世界充满仇恨团体和邪教的7个原因）
5 The Hippies Were Wrong
5 嬉皮士错了
Here is the greatest scene in the history of movies (WARNING: EXTREME NSFW LANGUAGE):
这是电影史上最伟大的场景（警告：极端不适合工作场所的语言）：
For those of you who can’t watch videos, it’s the famous speech Alec Baldwin gives in the cinematic masterpiece Glengarry Glenn Ross. Baldwin’s character — whom you assume is the villain — addresses a room full of dudes and tears them a new asshole, telling them that they’re all about to be fired unless they “close” the sales they’ve been assigned:
对于那些不能看视频的人来说，这是 Alec Baldwin 在电影杰作 Glengarry Glenn Ross 中发表的著名演讲。Baldwin 的角色——你认为是反派——对着一屋子的人发表演讲，告诉他们除非他们完成分配的销售任务，否则他们都将被解雇：
“Nice guy? I don’t give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. If you want to work here, close.”
“好人？我不在乎。好父亲？去你妈的！回家和你的孩子玩。如果你想在这里工作，完成销售。”
It’s brutal, rude, and borderline sociopathic, and also it is an honest and accurate expression of what the world is going to expect from you. The difference is that, in the real world, people consider it so wrong to talk to you that way that they’ve decided it’s better to simply let you keep failing.
这很残酷，粗鲁，接近反社会，但它是对世界对你期望的诚实而准确的表达。不同的是，在现实世界中，人们认为这样对你说话是错误的，所以他们决定最好让你继续失败。
That scene changed my life. I’d program my alarm clock to play it for me every morning if I knew how. Alec Baldwin was nominated for an Oscar for that movieand that’s the only scene he’s in. As smarter people have pointed out, the genius of that speech is that half of the people who watch it think that the point of the scene is “Wow, what must it be like to have such an asshole boss?” and the other half think, “Fuck yes, let’s go out and sell some goddamned real estate!”
那个场景改变了我的生活。如果我知道怎么做，我会把我的闹钟设定为每天早上为我播放它。Alec Baldwin 因那部电影获得了奥斯卡提名而那是他唯一的场景。正如更聪明的人指出的，那段演讲的天才之处在于，观看它的一半人认为场景的重点是“哇，有这样一个混蛋老板会是什么样子？”而另一半人则认为，“去他妈的，是的，让我们出去卖一些该死的房地产！”
Or, as the Last Psychiatrist blog put it:
“If you were in that room, some of you would understand this as a work, but feed off the energy of the message anyway, welcome the coach’s cursing at you, ‘this guy is awesome!’; while some of you would take it personally, this guy is a jerk, you have no right to talk to me like that, or — the standard maneuver when narcissism is confronted with a greater power — quietly seethe and fantasize about finding information that will out him as a hypocrite. So satisfying.”
“如果你在那个房间里，你们中的一些人会把这理解为一项工作，但无论如何都会从信息的能量中汲取力量，欢迎教练对你的咒骂，‘这个家伙太棒了！’；而你们中的一些人会把它当作个人问题，这个家伙是个混蛋，你没有权利这样对我说话，或者——当自恋遇到更大权力时的标准操作——默默地愤怒并幻想找到揭露他是伪君子的信息。如此令人满意。”
That excerpt is from an insightful critique of “hipsters” and why they seem to have so much trouble getting jobs (that doesn’t begin to do it justice, go read the whole thing), and the point is that the difference in those two attitudes — bitter vs. motivated — largely determines whether or not you’ll succeed in the world. For instance, some people want to respond to that speech with Tyler Durden’s line fromFight Club: “You are not your job.”
那段摘录来自对“嬉皮士”的深刻批评，解释了为什么他们似乎在找工作时遇到这么多麻烦（这还不足以公正地描述它，去读完整的文章），重点是这两种态度的差异——苦涩与激励——在很大程度上决定了你是否会在世界上成功。例如，有些人想用 Fight Club 中 Tyler Durden 的台词来回应那段演讲：“你不是你的工作。”
But, well, actually, you totally are. Granted, your “job” and your means of employment might not be the same thing, but in both cases, you are nothing more than the sum total of your useful skills. For instance, being a good mother is a job that requires a skill. It’s something a person can do that is useful to other members of society. But make no mistake: Your “job” — the useful thing you do for other people — is all you are.
但是，实际上，你完全是。诚然，你的“工作”和你的就业方式可能不是同一件事，但在这两种情况下，你不过是你有用技能的总和。例如，做一个好母亲是一项需要技能的工作。这是一个人可以做的对社会其他成员有用的事情。但不要误会：你的“工作”——你为他人做的有用的事情——就是你的一切。
There is a reason why surgeons get more respect than comedy writers. There is a reason mechanics get more respect than unemployed hipsters. There is a reason your job will become your label if your death makes the news (“NFL Linebacker Dies in Murder/Suicide”). Tyler said, “You are not your job,” but he also founded and ran a successful soap company and became the head of an international social and political movement. He was totally his job.
外科医生比喜剧作家更受尊重是有原因的。机械师比失业的嬉皮士更受尊重是有原因的。如果你的死亡上了新闻，你的工作将成为你的标签（“NFL 后卫在谋杀/自杀中死亡”）是有原因的。Tyler 说，“你不是你的工作”，但他也创办并经营了一家成功的肥皂公司，并成为一个国际社会和政治运动的领导者。他完全是他的工作。
Or think of it this way: Remember when Chick-fil-A came out against gay marriage? And how despite the protests, the company continues to sell millions of sandwiches every day? It’s not because the country agrees with them; it’s because they do their job of making delicious sandwiches well. And that’s all that matters. You don’t have to like it. I don’t like it when it rains on my birthday. It rains anyway. Clouds form and precipitation happens. People have needs and thus assign value to the people who meet them. These are simple mechanisms of the universe and they do not respond to our wishes.
或者这样想：还记得 Chick-fil-A 反对同性婚姻的时候吗？尽管有抗议，该公司每天仍然卖出数百万个三明治？这不是因为国家同意他们；而是因为他们做好了制作美味三明治的工作。这就是一切。你不必喜欢它。我不喜欢在我生日那天下雨。无论如何都会下雨。云形成，降水发生。人们有需求，因此赋予满足他们需求的人价值。这些是宇宙的简单机制，它们不会响应我们的愿望。
If you protest that you’re not a shallow capitalist materialist and that you disagree that money is everything, I can only say: Who said anything about money? You’re missing the larger point.
如果你抗议说你不是一个浅薄的资本主义物质主义者，并且你不同意金钱就是一切，我只能说：谁说了关于金钱的任何事情？你错过了更大的重点。
Related: How Mediocrity Can Quietly Destroy Us All（平庸如何悄悄地毁灭我们所有人）
4 What You Produce Does Not Have to Make Money, But It Does Have to Benefit People
4 你所生产的东西不一定要赚钱，但必须对人们有益
Let’s try a non-money example so you don’t get hung up on that. The demographic that Cracked writes for is heavy on 20-something males. So on our message boards and in my many inboxes I read several dozen stories a year from miserable, lonely guys who insist that women won’t come near them despite the fact that they are just the nicest guys in the world (these days, they’ve adopted the name, “Incels”). I can explain what is wrong with this mindset, but it would probably be better if I let Alec Baldwin explain it:
让我们试试一个非金钱的例子，这样你就不会纠结于此。Cracked 的读者群体主要是20多岁的男性。所以在我们的留言板和我的许多收件箱中，我每年都会读到几十个悲惨、孤独的家伙的故事，他们坚持认为尽管他们是世界上最好的家伙，女人还是不会靠近他们（这些天，他们采用了“Incels”这个名字）。我可以解释这种心态有什么问题，但可能最好让 Alec Baldwin 来解释：
In this case, Baldwin is playing the part of the attractive women in your life. They won’t put it as bluntly as he does — society has trained us not to be this honest with people — but the equation is the same. “Nice guy? Who gives a shit? If you want to work here, close.”
在这种情况下，Baldwin 扮演的是你生活中有吸引力的女人的角色。她们不会像他那样直言不讳——社会已经训练我们不要对人这么诚实——但等式是一样的。“好人？谁在乎？如果你想在这里工作，完成销售。”
So, what do you bring to the table? Because the girl in the bookstore that you’ve been daydreaming about moisturizes her face for an hour every night and feels guilty when she eats anything other than salad for lunch. She’s going to be a surgeon in 10 years. What do you do?
那么，你能带来什么？因为你在书店里梦寐以求的女孩每晚花一个小时给脸部保湿，午餐吃沙拉以外的任何东西都会感到内疚。她将在10年内成为一名外科医生。你做什么？
“What, so you’re saying that I can’t get girls like that unless I have a nice job and make lots of money?”
“什么，你是说除非我有一份好工作并赚很多钱，否则我不能得到这样的女孩？”
No, your brain jumps to that conclusion so you have an excuse to write off everyone who rejects you by assuming they’re just being shallow and selfish. I’m asking what do you offer? Are you smart? Funny? Interesting? Talented? Ambitious? Creative? OK, now what do you do to demonstrate those attributes to the world? Don’t say that you’re a nice guy — that’s the bare minimum. Pretty girls have guys being nice to them 36 times a day. The patient is bleeding in the street. Do you know how to operate or not?
不，你的大脑跳到这个结论，所以你有借口把所有拒绝你的人都写成只是肤浅和自私。我在问你能提供什么？你聪明吗？有趣吗？有趣吗？有才华吗？有野心吗？有创造力吗？好，现在你做什么来向世界展示这些属性？不要说你是个好人——这是最低限度。漂亮的女孩每天有36次有人对她们好。病人在街上流血。你知道如何操作吗？
“Well, I’m not sexist or racist or greedy or shallow or abusive! Not like those other douchebags!”
“好吧，我不是性别歧视者或种族主义者，也不是贪婪、肤浅或虐待狂！不像那些其他的混蛋！”
I’m sorry, I know that this is hard to hear, but if all you can do is list a bunch of faults you don’t have, then back the fuck away from the patient. There’s a witty, handsome guy with a promising career ready to step in and operate.
对不起，我知道这很难听，但如果你只能列出一堆你没有的缺点，那么请离病人远点。有一个机智、英俊、前途光明的家伙准备介入并操作。
Does that break your heart? OK, so now what? Are you going to mope about it, or are you going to learn how to do surgery? It’s up to you, but don’t complain about how girls fall for jerks; they fall for those jerks because those jerks have other things they can offer. “But I’m a great listener!” Are you? Because you’re willing to sit quietly in exchange for the chance to be in the proximity of a pretty girl (and spend every second imagining how soft her skin must be)? Well, guess what, there’s another guy in her life who also knows how to do that, and he can play the guitar. Saying that you’re a nice guy is like a restaurant whose only selling point is that the food doesn’t make you sick. You’re like a new movie whose title is This Movie Is in English, and its tagline is “The actors are clearly visible.”
这让你心碎了吗？好吧，那现在呢？你是要为此闷闷不乐，还是要学习如何做手术？这取决于你，但不要抱怨女孩们为什么会爱上混蛋；她们爱上那些混蛋是因为那些混蛋有其他可以提供的东西。“但我是一个很好的倾听者！”你是吗？因为你愿意安静地坐着换取靠近漂亮女孩的机会（并且每一秒都在想象她的皮肤有多柔软）？好吧，猜猜看，她生活中还有另一个人也知道怎么做，而且他会弹吉他。说你是个好人就像一家餐馆唯一的卖点是食物不会让你生病。你就像一部新电影，标题是这部电影是英文的，标语是“演员清晰可见”。
I think this is why you can be a “nice guy” and still feel terrible about yourself. Specifically …
我认为这就是为什么你可以是一个“好人”但仍然对自己感觉糟糕的原因。具体来说……
Related: 9 Common Pieces Of Life Advice That Are Bad And Stupid（9条常见的生活建议是糟糕和愚蠢的）
3 You Hate Yourself Because You Don’t Do Anything
3 你恨自己是因为你什么都不做
“So, what, you’re saying that I should pick up a book on how to get girls?”
“所以，你是说我应该拿起一本关于如何追女孩的书？”
Only if step one in the book is “Start making yourself into the type of person girls want to be around.”
只有当书中的第一步是“开始把自己变成女孩们想要在身边的人”时。
Because that’s the step that gets skipped — it’s always “How can I get a job?” and not “How can I become the type of person employers want?” It’s “How can I get pretty girls to like me?” instead of “How can I become the type of person that pretty girls like?” See, because that second one could very well require giving up many of your favorite hobbies and paying more attention to your appearance, and God knows what else. You might even have to changeyour personality.
因为那是被跳过的一步——总是“我怎么能找到工作？”而不是“我怎么能成为雇主想要的人？”是“我怎么能让漂亮女孩喜欢我？”而不是“我怎么能成为漂亮女孩喜欢的人？”你看，因为第二个可能需要放弃你许多喜欢的爱好，并更多地关注你的外表，天知道还有什么。你甚至可能需要改变你的个性。
“But why can’t I find someone who just likes me for me?” you ask. The answer is because humans need things. The victim is bleeding, and all you can do is look down and complain that there aren’t more gunshot wounds that just fix themselves?
“但为什么我不能找到一个只喜欢我的人？”你问。答案是因为人类需要东西。受害者在流血，而你所能做的只是低头抱怨没有更多的枪伤能自己愈合？
Here’s another video (NSFW):
这里有另一个视频（不适合工作场所）：
Everyone who watched that video instantly became a little happier, although not all for the same reasons. Can you do that for people? Why not? What’s stopping you from strapping on your proverbial thong and cape and taking to your proverbial stage and flapping your proverbial penis at people? That guy knows the secret to winning at human life: that doing … whatever you call that … was better than not doing it.
每个看过那个视频的人都立刻变得有点开心，尽管原因不尽相同。你能为人们做那样的事吗？为什么不？是什么阻止你穿上象征性的丁字裤和斗篷，走上象征性的舞台，向人们挥舞象征性的阴茎？那家伙知道赢得人类生活的秘密：做……无论你怎么称呼……比不做要好。
“But I’m not good at anything!” Well, I have good news — throw enough hours of repetition at it and you can get sort of good at anything. I was the world’s shittiest writer when I was an infant. I was only slightly better at 25. But while I was failing miserably at my career, I wrote in my spare time for eight straight years, an article a week, before I ever made real money off it. It took 13 years for me to get good enough to make the New York Times best-seller list. It took me probably 20,000 hours of practice to sand the edges off my sucking.
“但我什么都不擅长！”好吧，我有好消息——投入足够多的重复时间，你可以在任何事情上变得有点好。当我还是婴儿时，我是世界上最糟糕的作家。我在25岁时只稍微好一点。但在我职业生涯惨败的同时，我在业余时间连续八年，每周写一篇文章，直到我真正赚到钱。花了13年时间，我才足够好进入 纽约时报 畅销书榜。我可能花了大约20,000小时的练习来磨掉我的糟糕。
Don’t like the prospect of pouring all of that time into a skill? Well, I have good news and bad news. The good news is that the sheer act of practicing will help you come out of your shell — I got through years of tedious office work because I knew that I was learning a unique skill on the side. People quit because it takes too long to see results, because they can’t figure out that the process is the result.
不喜欢把所有时间都投入到一项技能中的前景？好吧，我有好消息和坏消息。好消息是，单纯的练习行为会帮助你走出自己的壳——我通过多年的枯燥办公室工作，因为我知道我在旁边学习一项独特的技能。人们放弃是因为看到结果需要太长时间，因为他们无法理解过程就是结果。
The bad news is that you have no other choice. If you want to work here, close.
坏消息是你别无选择。如果你想在这里工作，完成销售。
Because in my non-expert opinion, you don’t hate yourself because you have low self-esteem, or because other people were mean to you. You hate yourself because you don’t do anything. Not even you can just “love you for you” — that’s why you’re miserable and sending me private messages asking me what I think you should do with your life. Do the math: How much of your time is spent consuming things other people made (TV, music, video games, websites) versus making your own? Only one of those adds to your value as a human being.
因为在我这个非专家的意见中，你不恨自己是因为你自尊心低，或者因为别人对你不好。你恨自己是因为你什么都不做。即使是你也不能只是“爱你自己”——这就是为什么你痛苦，并给我发私信问我认为你应该如何生活。算一算：你有多少时间花在消费别人制作的东西（电视、音乐、视频游戏、网站）上，而不是制作自己的东西？只有其中一个增加了你作为人类的价值。
“But the whole system is corrupt and on the verge of collapse, what difference does any of this make?” Friend, if the system falls apart, take everything I’ve said above and multiply it times a thousand. The person without skill and drive will not be given food. The new masters may fly the banner of equality, but you’ll slowly notice that the talented and charismatic are still getting the best stuff. That won’t change in your lifetime, or in the lifetimes of your great-grandchildren.
“但整个系统是腐败的，濒临崩溃，这有什么区别？”朋友，如果系统崩溃了，把我上面说的一切乘以一千。没有技能和动力的人不会得到食物。新的主人可能会打着平等的旗号，但你会慢慢注意到，有才华和有魅力的人仍然会得到最好的东西。这在你的有生之年，或者在你曾孙的有生之年都不会改变。
Related: 5 Harsh Truths That Will Make You Less Of A Jerk（5个让你不那么混蛋的残酷真相）
2 What You Are Inside Only Matters Because of What It Makes You Do
2 你内在的东西只有因为它让你做的事情才重要
“But it’s what’s on the inside that matters! My mom said so!”
“但重要的是内在的东西！我妈妈这么说！”
Being in the business I’m in, I know dozens of aspiring writers. They think of themselves as writers, they introduce themselves as writers at parties, they know that deep inside, they have the heart of a writer. The only thing they’re missing is that minor final step, where theyactually fucking write things.
在我所从事的行业中，我认识几十个有抱负的作家。他们认为自己是作家，他们在聚会上自我介绍为作家，他们知道在内心深处，他们有作家的心。唯一缺少的是最后那一步，他们实际上写东西。
But really, does that matter? Is “writing things” all that important when deciding who is and who is not truly a “writer”?
但真的，这重要吗？在决定谁是真正的“作家”时，“写东西”真的那么重要吗？
For the love of God, yes.
看在上帝的份上，是的。
See, there’s a common defense to everything I’ve said so far, and to every critical voice in your life. It’s the thing your ego is saying to you in order to prevent you from having to do the hard work of improving: “I know I’m a good person on the inside.” It may also be phrased as “I know who I am” or “I just have to be me.”
你看，对我迄今为止所说的一切，以及你生活中每一个批评的声音，都有一个常见的辩护。那是你的自我在对你说，以防止你不得不做出改进的艰苦工作：“我知道我内心是一个好人。”它也可以表述为“我知道我是谁”或“我只需要做我自己”。
Don’t get me wrong; who you are inside is everything — the guy who built a house for his family from scratch did it because of who he was inside. Every bad thing you’ve ever done has started with a bad impulse, some thought ricocheting around inside your skull until you had to act on it. And every good thing you’ve done is the same — “who you are inside” is the metaphorical dirt from which your fruit grows. But here’s what everyone needs to know, and what many of you can’t accept:
不要误会；你内在的东西是一切——那个从头开始为家人建造房子的人是因为他内在的东西。你曾经做过的每一件坏事都始于一个坏的冲动，一些想法在你的头骨内反弹，直到你不得不采取行动。而你做过的每一件好事也是一样的——“你内在的东西”是你果实生长的比喻性土壤。但这是每个人都需要知道的，也是你们许多人无法接受的：
“You” are nothing but the fruit.
“你”不过是果实。
Nobody cares about your dirt. “Who you are inside” is meaningless aside from what it produces for other people.
没有人关心你的土壤。“你内在的东西”除了它为他人生产的东西之外毫无意义。
Inside, you have great compassion for poor people. Great. Does that result in you doing anything about it? Do you hear about some terrible tragedy in your community and say, “Oh, those poor children. Let them know that they are in my thoughts”? Because fuck you if so — find out what they need and help provide it. A hundred million people send thoughts and prayers after every mass shooting. What did the collective power of those good thoughts provide? Jack fucking shit. Children die every day because millions of us tell ourselves that caring is just as good as doing. It’s an internal mechanism controlled by the lazy part of your brain to keep you from actually doing work.
内心深处，你对穷人怀有极大的同情心。太好了。这是否促使你采取了行动？你是否听说了社区中一些可怕的悲剧，并说：“哦，那些可怜的孩子。让他们知道我在想着他们”？因为如果是这样，那就去你的吧——找出他们需要什么并帮助他们。每次大规模枪击事件后，都有一亿人送上祝福。这些美好想法的集体力量提供了什么？他妈的。每天都有孩子死去，因为我们数百万人告诉自己，关心和行动一样好。这是一种由你大脑中懒惰的部分控制的内部机制，阻止你真正去做事。
How many of you are walking around right now saying, “She/he would love me if she/he only knew what an interesting person I am!” Really? How do all of your interesting thoughts and ideas manifest themselves in the world? What do they cause you to do? If your dream girl or guy had a hidden camera that followed you around for a month, would they be impressed with what they saw? Remember, they can’t read your mind — they can only observe. Would they want to be a part of that life?
你们中有多少人现在在说，“如果她/他知道我是多么有趣的人，她/他会爱上我！”真的吗？你所有有趣的想法和点子是如何在世界上表现出来的？它们让你做了什么？如果你的梦中情人或梦中情人有一个隐藏的摄像头跟踪你一个月，他们会对他们看到的印象深刻吗？记住，他们不能读你的心思——他们只能观察。他们会想成为那种生活的一部分吗？
Because all I’m asking you to do is apply the same standard to yourself that you apply to everyone else. Don’t you have that annoying Christian friend whose only offer to help anyone ever is to “pray for them”? Doesn’t it drive you nuts? I’m not even commenting on whether or not prayer works; it doesn’t change the fact that they chose the one type of help that doesn’t require them to get off the sofa. They abstain from every vice, they think clean thoughts, their internal dirt is as pure as can be, but what fruit grows from it? And they should know this better than anybody — I stole the fruit metaphor from the Bible. Jesus said something to the effect of “a tree is judged by its fruit” over and over and over. Granted, Jesus never said, “If you want to work here, close.” No, he said, ” Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.”
因为我要求你做的只是对自己应用你对其他人应用的相同标准。你没有那个讨厌的基督徒朋友，他们唯一的帮助方式是“为他们祈祷”吗？这不是让你抓狂吗？我甚至不评论祈祷是否有效；这并不改变他们选择了一种不需要离开沙发的帮助方式的事实。他们戒除一切恶习，他们思考干净的想法，他们的内在土壤尽可能纯净，但从中长出的果实是什么？他们应该比任何人都更清楚这一点——我从圣经中偷来了果实的比喻。耶稣说过类似“树以其果实来判断”的话在这里和在这里和在这里。当然，耶稣从未说过，“如果你想在这里工作，完成销售。”不，他说，“ 每一棵不结好果子的树都要砍下来扔进火里。”
The people didn’t react well to being told that, just as the salesmen didn’t react well to Alec Baldwin telling them that they needed to grow some balls or resign themselves to shining his shoes. Which brings us to the final point …
The people didn’t react well to being told that, just as the salesmen didn’t react well to Alec Baldwin telling them that they needed to grow some balls or resign themselves to shining his shoes. Which brings us to the final point …
Related: 6 Things That Are Secretly Turning You Into A Bad Person（6件悄悄让你变成坏人的事情）
1 Everything Inside You Will Fight Improvement
1 你内心的一切都会抗拒改进
The human mind is a miracle, and you will never see it spring more beautifully into action than when it is fighting against evidence that it needs to change. Your psyche is equipped with layer after layer of defense mechanisms designed to shoot down anything that might keep things from staying exactly where they are — ask any addict. So even now, some of you reading this are feeling your brain bombard you with knee-jerk reasons to reject it. From experience, I can say that these seem to come in the form of …
人类的心灵是一个奇迹，当它在对抗需要改变的证据时，你永远不会看到它更美丽地行动。你的心理装备了一层又一层的防御机制，旨在击落任何可能阻止事情保持原样的东西——问问任何一个瘾君子。所以即使现在，你们中的一些人在阅读这篇文章时，感觉你的大脑在用膝跳反应的理由轰炸你以拒绝它。根据经验，我可以说这些似乎以以下形式出现……
*Intentionally Interpreting Any Criticism as an Insult
*故意将任何批评解释为侮辱
“Who is he to call me lazy and worthless! A good person would never talk to me like this! He wrote this whole thing just to feel superior to me and to make me feel bad about my life! I’m going to think up my own insult to even the score!”
“他是谁，竟敢说我懒惰和无用！一个好人永远不会这样对我说话！他写这整篇文章只是为了觉得自己比我优越，让我对自己的生活感到糟糕！我要想出自己的侮辱来扳回一局！”
*Focusing on the Messenger to Avoid Hearing the Message
*专注于信使以避免听到信息
“Who is THIS guy to tell ME how to live? Oh, like he’s so high and mighty! It’s just some dumb writer on the Internet! I’m going to go dig up something on him that reassures me that he’s stupid, and that everything he’s saying is stupid! This guy is so pretentious, it makes me puke!”
“这个家伙是谁，竟敢告诉我如何生活？哦，好像他那么高高在上！他只是互联网上的一个愚蠢作家！我要去挖掘一些关于他的东西，让我放心他是愚蠢的，他说的一切都是愚蠢的！这个家伙太装腔作势了，让我想吐！”
*Focusing on the Tone to Avoid Hearing the Content
*专注于语气以避免听到内容
“I’m going to dig through here until I find a joke that is offensive when taken out of context, and then talk and think only about that! I’ve heard that a single offensive word can render an entire book invisible!”
“我要在这里翻找，直到找到一个脱离上下文时令人反感的笑话，然后只谈论和思考那个！我听说一个冒犯的词可以让整本书消失！”
*Revising Your Own History
*修订你自己的历史
“Things aren’t so bad! I know that I was threatening suicide last month, but I’m feeling better now! It’s entirely possible that if I just keep doing exactly what I’m doing, eventually things will work out! I’ll get my big break, and if I keep doing favors for that pretty girl, eventually she’ll come around!”
“事情没那么糟！我知道我上个月威胁要自杀，但我现在感觉好多了！完全有可能如果我继续做我正在做的事情，最终事情会好转！我会得到我的大好机会，如果我继续为那个漂亮女孩做帮忙，最终她会回心转意！”
*Pretending That Any Self-Improvement Would Somehow Be Selling Out Your True Self
*假装任何自我改进都会以某种方式出卖你的真实自我
“Oh, so I guess I’m supposed to get rid of all of my manga and instead go to the gym for six hours a day and get a spray tan? Because THAT IS THE ONLY OTHER OPTION.”
“哦，所以我猜我应该摆脱我所有的漫画，而是每天去健身房六个小时并进行喷雾晒黑？因为那是唯一的其他选择。”
*Delaying any self-improvement until the entire world changes to accommodate you
*推迟任何自我改进，直到整个世界改变以适应你
“If I work hard, I’ll just be perpetuating a corrupt system! Granted, the system has no reason to listen to me as long as I’m not contributing anything, thus ensuring that I’ll never be in a position to help change it, but still!”
“如果我努力工作，我只会延续一个腐败的系统！当然，只要我不做出任何贡献，系统就没有理由听我的，从而确保我永远不会处于帮助改变它的位置，但仍然！”
And so on. Remember, misery is comfortable. It’s why so many people prefer it. Happiness takes effort. Also, courage — it’s incredibly comforting to know that as long as you don’t create anything in your life, then nobody can attack the thing you created. It’s so much easier to just sit back and criticize other people’s creations. This movie is stupid. That couple’s kids are brats. That other couple’s relationship is a mess. That rich guy is shallow. This restaurant sucks. This Internet writer is an asshole. I’d better leave a mean comment demanding that the website fire him. See, I created something.
等等。记住，痛苦是舒适的。这就是为什么这么多人更喜欢它。幸福需要努力。还有，勇气——知道只要你不在生活中创造任何东西，就没有人可以攻击你创造的东西，这令人难以置信的安慰。坐下来批评别人的创作要容易得多。这部电影很愚蠢。那对夫妇的孩子是小混蛋。那对夫妇的关系是一团糟。那个有钱人很肤浅。这家餐馆很糟糕。这个网络作家是个混蛋。我最好留下一个恶毒的评论，要求网站解雇他。看，我创造了什么。
Oh, wait, did I forget to mention that part? Yeah, whatever you try to build or create — be it a poem, or a new skill, or a new relationship — you will find yourself immediately surrounded by non-creators who trash it. Maybe not to your face, but they’ll do it. Your drunk friends do not want you to get sober. Your fat friends do not want you to start a fitness regimen. Your jobless friends do not want to see you embark on a career.
哦，等等，我是不是忘了提到那部分？是的，无论你试图建造或创造什么——无论是诗歌，还是新技能，还是新关系——你会发现自己立即被非创造者包围，他们会抨击它。也许不会当面，但他们会这样做。你喝醉的朋友不希望你清醒。你胖的朋友不希望你开始健身计划。你失业的朋友不希望看到你开始职业生涯。
Just remember, they’re only expressing their own fear, since trashing other people’s work is another excuse to do nothing. “Why should I create anything when the things other people create suck? I would totally have written a novel by now, but I’m going to wait for something good, I don’t want to write the next Twilight!” As long as they never produce anything, their work will forever be perfect and beyond reproach. Or if they do produce something, they’ll make sure they do it with detached irony. They’ll make it intentionally bad to make it clear to everyone else that this isn’t their real effort. Their real effort would have been amazing. Not like the shit you made.
记住，他们只是表达自己的恐惧，因为抨击别人的工作是另一个不做任何事情的借口。“为什么我应该创造任何东西，当别人创造的东西很糟糕时？我现在完全会写一本小说，但我要等一些好的东西，我不想写下一个暮光之城！”只要他们从不生产任何东西，他们的工作将永远是完美的，无可指责。或者如果他们确实生产了什么，他们会确保他们以超然的讽刺方式做。 他们会故意做得很糟糕，以向其他人表明这不是他们的真正努力。他们的真正努力本来会很棒。不像你做的那些狗屎。
Don’t be that person. If you are that person, don’t be that person anymore. This is what’s making people hate you. This is what’s making you hate yourself.
不要成为那样的人。如果你是那样的人，不要再成为那样的人。这就是让人们讨厌你的原因。这就是让你讨厌自己的原因。
So how about this: one year from now, that’s our deadline. While other people are telling you “Let’s make a New Year’s resolution to lose 15 pounds this year!” I’m going to say let’s pledge to do fucking anything — add any skill, any improvement to your human tool set, and get good enough at it to impress people. Don’t ask me what — hell, pick something at random if you don’t know. Take a class in karate, or ballroom dancing, or pottery. Learn to bake. Build a birdhouse. Learn massage. Learn a programming language. Film a porno. Adopt a superhero persona and fight crime. Start a YouTube vlog. Write for Cracked.
那么这样如何：从现在起一年，这是我们的最后期限。当其他人告诉你“让我们制定一个新年决心，今年减掉15磅！”时，我要说让我们承诺做任何事情——为你的人类工具集添加任何技能，任何改进，并在这方面变得足够好以打动人们。不要问我什么——见鬼，如果你不知道，随便挑一个。参加空手道课，或社交舞蹈课，或陶艺课。学会烘焙。建一个鸟舍。学习按摩。学习编程语言。拍一部色情片。采用超级英雄的身份打击犯罪。开一个 YouTube 视频博客。为 Cracked 写作。
But the key is, I don’t want you to focus on something great that you’re going to make happen to you (“I’m going to find a girlfriend, I’m going to make lots of money …”). I want you to purely focus on giving yourself a skill that would make you ever so slightly more interesting and valuable to other people. “I don’t have the money to take a cooking class.” Then fucking Google “how to cook.” Damn it, you have to kill those excuses. Or they will kill you.
但关键是，我不希望你专注于一些你将要发生在你身上的伟大事情（“我要找到一个女朋友，我要赚很多钱……”）。我希望你纯粹专注于给自己一个技能，这会让你对其他人稍微更有趣和有价值。“我没有钱上烹饪课。”那就去谷歌“如何烹饪”。该死的，你必须消除那些借口。否则它们会杀了你。
You have nothing to lose, and the world needs you, now more than ever.
你没有什么可失去的，世界比以往任何时候都更需要你。